THQ obviously wants us to know that everything's going smoothly with their upcoming shooter, Red Faction: Guerrilla. The latest trailer for the game explains more about the story:

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I thought of something profound and heart-stoppingly erotic this morning. Thing is, I already forgot what it was, so you're gonna have to make do with what I'm about to write.

The world is a happy and delightful pony playground, covered in green meadows, cow shit and pretty trees. Embrace the pink-pony-puffness of life and smell the fresh, steamy dung. Remember, most of the puffness and fluffiness is an illusion. Turds are a symbol of reality.

♬ ♫ Intermission ♫ ♪

Family life aside, I'd just like to say that the infrequent appearance of naked women in my life is a constant aggravation.

Good news. Definitely good news. However, the look of this new DLC cries out "weirdness!" Here's the trailer:

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And here are the shots:

click to view full gallery

Mirror's Edge DLC will challenge players to achieve the fastest times possible on nine races across seven all-new and totally redesigned Time Trial maps. In other words, there will be no guns, no cops and no urban environments: "this is true aesthetics, agility and flow that will challenge any runner."

"The freedom of movement and control in first person has been the most popular aspect of Mirror's Edge so we decided to distil these down to their purest form for this map pack," says Owen O'Brien, Senior Producer, DICE. "We deliberately chose a more abstract aesthetic that is still within our distinctive art style and then focused on flow and gameplay to create an experience and challenge very different from the main game."

This special DLC pack will be available late January 2009 for $10 USD (PS3/PC) or 800 Microsoft points (X360). As an added bonus, all PS3 Mirror's Edge fans will be able to download an additional map for free.

Check out our review of the Xbox 360 edition of Mirror's Edge.

Update - PC version release date:

That's right the PC edition now has an official release date - January 13, 2009.

GTAGaming has the official word from Rockstar regarding the recent issues gamers have been having with the PC version of GTA IV.

"We are aware that a small number of fans are having problems running GTA IV on their PCs and we would like to assure them we are working to help solve these as quickly as possible," said a Rockstar rep. "We would ask anyone that is encountering difficulties to contact their local technical support helpline for advice and recommendations. These telephone numbers can be found in the game's manual."

The statement continues: "There is also a regularly updated technical support page available on the Rockstar Games website where there are many useful FAQs, and information on how to resolve some common problems being encountered."

We didn't expect this blunder from the boys and gals at Rockstar. Hope they resolve it quickly. We'll let you know the moment the patch is available.

MTV Multiplayer reports about several new titles, the most interesting of which is the next installment in the popular shooter series Call of Duty. It's a well-known fact, of course, that Infinity Ward is working on a new CoD game, only instead of unofficially calling it "Call of Duty 6" -- like they have up until now -- they've decided to refer to it as Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2. It's been said that we can expect the game to arrive come Fall next year (the image above is from CoD 4).

MTV continues: "We’ve also heard rumors that Bizarre Creations was working on a racing-oriented James Bond game, which have turned out to be true. The original Bond adventure, not tied to a movie storyline, is coming this September. The former Project Gotham Racing studio is also working on an original racing IP for the publisher, which they tagged as “‘Mario Kart’ meets ‘Forza.’”

Hm, I'm very excited about Modern Warfare 2. On the other hand, when I hear stuff like ‘Mario Kart’ meets ‘Forza’ I cannot seem to control my urge to vomit intensely.

Guitar Hero 5 was mentioned and a few more titles.

Stormregion and EA are currently working on a new real-time strategy entitled Codename Panzers: Cold War. Hungarian developer says this game is a successor to “Codename: Panzers” and that "for the first time ever, the series leaves the World War II stage to take the story into Cold War East-West conflicts fought on fictitious battlefields. The developers have placed special emphasis on deep story lines and rich battle effects."

“The Stormregion team behind Codename: Panzers – Cold War is acclaimed for its outstanding quality development and varied gameplay” said Jörg Rohrer, Business Development Director at EA Germany. 'The cooperation with 10TACLE STUDIOS will help this real-time strategy game get the success it so richly deserves in Europe.“

We've received a trailer for the game so check it out:

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Initially, the game was announced with a 2007 release date, but now they're saying it's going to arrive come February 09, 2009 for the PC.

While Rockstar already launched the PC version of its console smash Grand Theft Auto IV, we ourselves haven't tried out the game yet. It looks like game audiences everywhere are starting to get peeved about numerous issues. Players continue to complain about a variety of errors, from missing textures to crashes and Shack claims two separate, nondescript error codes that kept them from loading the game at all.

Documented bugs exist on Steam where you can also find a list of user-compiled potential fixes.

In addition to problems with missing textures, which were attributed to corrupt graphics drivers, a whole bunch of users weren't able to resolve this even after reinstall the drivers. As we've learned, GTA IV PC is also restricting certain players from changing their graphical settings.

That's not all. As it turns out, gamers are hampered by the game's DRM as well, on top of a cumbersome install/update routine for the much-touted Social Club.

Rockstar hasn't commented officially on this. Word has it that a patch is in development and there are some workarounds available.

Why is that during masturbation I've always thought of older women? Not grannies, mind you, but rather like great-looking manipulative, large-breasted milk factories and sex-starved cougars... Why is that? Is it Nature's intention to turn us into that type of prevy perv? Sure the explanation would be that at the time when the first sexual fantasies occur you're usually surrounded by older women, including your mom.

To this day, I'm still aroused by older women and slightly less by younger females. The weird thing is, I don't feel like complaining. I'm happy with the way things are.

This concludes our daily mentioning of masturbation, sex, women and boobs. Oh hold on, I didn't mention boobs. Okay, I just did. Here it is again, just in case:

Boobs!