BloodRayne 2 Review

I have one big problem with vampire chicks, and BloodRayne in particular. They have tits. Seriously, what is the reason of having milk glands and being able to lactate if your kind's primary source of food is not milk but blood? If you think about it, BloodRayne's character is anatomically paradoxical, and the funny thing is no one is complaining about it - freaking geeks and their oversexed fantasies. Suddenly, it's all right to influence our misguided youth by suggesting that it's OK for half-vampires to lactate. Where is Jack Thompson when you need him, eh? (He's in his office getting ready to sue you for that porno lactating vampire scenario, I'm sure. -Mo)

Nothing that a little Aspirin can't fix.

I learned this in the cheerleaders.

Oh right... yeah, thanks for reminding me; the game has an M rating. This is an adult video game. Even so, as my good friends at the UK's Advertising Standards Agency explained: "...the fact still remains that over 70% of adults are gullible, infantile, idiots who are incapable of spotting even the most blatant attempts at marketing. 98% of the 70% percent in question drank Coca-Cola for two weeks nonstop, severely endangering their health, after the Atlanta-based company released their ad: 'Coca-Cola: It makes things bigger!' campaign". And you know there is really no arguing with facts, right?

In a way, BloodRayne 2 is a game that perfectly suits its target audience. We're talking about an extremely gory video game where decapitating a person is about as normal as tea with milk is to the British (Are we talking milk from a lactating vampire here? -Mo). If we need compare the art style and the visual representation of the said dismemberments and other forms of extreme gore, BloodRayne 2 in a way reminds me of Quentin Tarantino's Kill Bill, but without the intelligent dialogue.

Granted, if you had played the first game, you'd regard the sequel as very refreshing. One of the main sticking points with the first game, (as far as I can remember) was the absolutely atrocious voice acting and the silly dialogue. The good news is that the voice acting is much better in the sequel, and so is the dialogue... for the most part, (Let's be honest, it could only get better). Yeah, BloodRayne is full of cheesy one-liners, but to be honest with you, I got used to it fairly quickly and found it endearing after a while. For what it aims to achieve, BloodRayne 2, as far as the dialogue and the overall atmosphere are concerned, comes off as being a stylish yet slightly mindless video game counterpart of an action flick with hot babes and vampires... and tons of fake blood. Considering the subject matter and the original intention of the developers, I'd say they've done a pretty good job at it.

Speaking in more technical terms, the combat has been improved quite a bit over the original. It's more complex, with a variety of new moves, more vampire powers, and most importantly, once you get accustomed to the controls, they will feel very intuitive and natural, allowing you to enjoy the action on screen fully. The situational puzzles are rather well incorporated into the levels and the maps themselves are good enough to keep the gameplay flowing. Again, this is very important for an action game. The use of BloodRayne's grappling hook has been emphasized even more in the sequel along with some of her new powers.

As for the intelligence of your opponents, there's not much to say here. Yes, a few times, they would get stuck in a tight space, but this didn't happen nearly as often as to ruin the experience for me.

I really liked how the environment has been made a lot more destructible. Clearly, the physics engine has had a major overhaul - you can destroy a whole myriad of objects that you come across, and the bad guys will interact with certain objects in the environment in the most gruesome way possible. Let's just say you'll see quite a few of them impaled on sharp and pointy metal objects. Another thing is the inclusion of the rag doll physics. While the new technology (well, new for the series anyway) is not super-realistic or exceptional in any way, it serves its function perfectly by adding more flare to the combat.

A Kill Bill moment?

This guy died happy I bet.

The graphics on the other hand look very similar to the original, which, in all fairness, was very advanced for its time, with its use of bump mapping and such. It's quite possible that the polygon count has been bumped up (in fact, that's most likely the case), and that some advanced shader effects have been implemented, but the graphics do look similar to the original, there is no doubt about it.

Overall, it is my opinion that though not without its tacky moments, BloodRayne 2 is a fairly stylish video game, with some interesting boss creatures and a feisty (busty) leading lady. The combat is better than it was in the original; the game is challenging but very rarely frustrating and all of the other technical aspects of it work well to keep the action smooth and fun for the player.

The game's greatest fault if you will, is that while most of its elements are good and it comes off as being enjoyable on the PC, it's not really exceptional in any way. Still, considering how short we are on playable PC titles these days, it wouldn't be a mistake if you picked this one up. It's easy on your hardware (mid-range rigs will run it without a hitch) and it offers a sufficient number of gameplay hours.

Providing, however, you play it with the right frame of mind. If I wanted BloodRayne to quote passages from "War and Peace", I would've most certainly objected to her not having blood bags in the place of her perfectly sculpted tits, so shut the fuck up, you pseudo intellectual whore. (I smell a Pulitzer prize! -Mo)